Volume 2. Chapter 3.

it's week five of the season

So, the start of October is with us. We are beyond the equinox and we are on the descent into Christmastide.

With the changing of the seasons, perhaps we can purge September from our souls and start with a fresh purpose, as we jog on into Autumn.

The hardy band of Bees’ supporters who made the trip up the road to Malton and Norton last week saw at least forty minutes where the boys looked to be finding some form and going in to half time our hosts led by only 19 points to 15 and it felt very much as if we had a “game on” as some might like to shout.

Indeed we had the audacity to take the lead as Henry R-P gathered a deft little nudge out to his wing and scampered home for a well taken score with about three minutes on the clock.

Sadly, it was not to be as the wheels rather came off in the second half and the home side galloped away with it; but looking at a 52-15 scoreline does not reflect properly how well the lads played in that first half, up the hill at the Gannock, as M+N’s scenic ground is known.

So we move on. This week, Saturday October 2nd, we welcome Durham City to Wagon Lane. Those of you who have dared peek at the league table might be pleasantly surprised to see that we are not currently placed on the bottom rung; our opponents have that honour just at the moment. However, that may change at any time when the men at the RFU remember to dock the five points we owe them for not honouring the fixture at Pocklington. The removal of those five league points will obviously shuffle The Bees to the bottom of the deck, so this Saturday’s clash will become the battle of the bottom feeders - Durham City with a bold minus three after four games played and ourselves with an equally depressing minus four.

I will come back to Saturday’s tussle in due course, but first a review of how everyone else is doing around the league.

Around North One East

Top of the shop, undefeated, holding maximum points, with four bonus point wins from their four games we find Ilkley or as their older residents might prefer, Olicana.

Note: Having given the league table a hard stare, I don’t think that can be correct as Ilkley only scored three tries last week, but seem to have acquired a bonus point win. I shall write to MP to raise this in the House.

(Actually, I didn’t write to my MP, I pointed this out to the man from the RFU and Ilkley will be still top, but with only 19 points.)

The men without hats (bar t’at, keep up!) have so far played and largely summarily despatched Consett (82-0), Morpeth (31-3 away), Old Brods (36-12) and last week won through relatively squeakily against Cleckheaton (19-15). I chose that description advisedly as Ilkley only took the lead for the first time in the 78th minute, scoring the aforementioned third try to get the win.

This week the legion of massed Chelsea tractors will gather at Heath, who lurk in sixth spot in the division, with three wins from their four games.

We get our moment at Stacks Field on Saturday October 30th and then return the favour when Ilkley visit Wagon Lane on 19th February.

Snuggling up behind Olicana, we find Beverley in second place in the table with two wins and two draws. I’d say two draws in a season is a tad unusual, so to have notched two in the opening four fixtures must be a rare event in Rugby. Indeed, dear friends, Driffield opened the season with two draws - having a 24 points apiece ding dong with Scarborough in their season opener, followed by splitting 52 points evenly in game 2 with M and N.

They have obviously dispensed with those socialist principles of a fair share for all as they put Durham to the sword by 33 points to five in week three. They followed up on that result by pulling Consett’s pants down to the tune of 55-10 at Consett.

Driffield entertain Morpeth this weekend and all things being equal, it looks like another “w” will be notched on the bedpost out there in the Wolds come Saturday night.

We get our chance to get up close and personal with Driffield when they are our visitors on 27th November. We return the favour on Saturday 26th March over at their spot.

With more wins, but fewer league points we stumble across Cleckheaton and Moortown in third and fourth respectively.

As mentioned above, Cleck lost a knee trembler last time out at Ilkley, which ended their three game winning streak which launched their season. Game one turned out to be a walkover for Cleck in their first run out against Durham City. Durham were docked the five points and as a result are currently propping up the table. However, Clackhuddersfax tore a strip off Consett in week 2 and ran home victors 34-20. Week three, September 18th, saw a home victory over Morpeth 36-27. Cleck host Old Brods this Saturday in what looks like a tasty little derby in the shadow of the M62.

We get a first pop at Cleck at Wagon Lane on Saturday 13th November and make the return journey on Saturday 5th March.

Moortown, fourth in the table, have also pocketed three wins from four games. They opened the season on the right side of the decision, in an old fashioned points fest, winning 43-36 at home to M n N.

This points scoring trend continued at a similar pace, as North Leeds’ finest gave Durham City “what for” in week 2, 25-42 at Durham. Week Three saw Consett take a frightful beating at M-town, as the home side galloped away by 59-17.

Unfortunately someone rather let the air out of the tyres last weekend as Morpeth brought the three wins to a shuddering conclusion as the northern most outpost of the division won 32-5 on their own patch.

We get our chance to have a run on the Leeds Ring Road to Mo’town on Saturday 20th November and they return the favour on Saturday 12th March.

We are only four games into this season, so it is rather early to start writing off anyone in the division or even describing the sides in fifth to eighth position as the also rans, as all four sides have only lost once in their four outings.

Those four sides are Malton and Norton, Heath, Old Brods and Scarborough. We witnessed at first hand that M and N know how to score when they get going last week at the Gannock, but aside from giving the Bees a hiding in the second half, Malton’s other win this season came at Heath, a week afore, where they prevailed by five in a 15-20 contest. The week before that, on September 11, Malton benefitted from Driffield’s Communist tendency and drew 26 apiece. The season opener for “The Gannockers” was the previously mentioned bunfight with Mo’town, not to be confused with the famous record label. We next see the good folk of Malton and their neighbours across the River Derwent at Wagon Lane on 15th January.

Heath began their campaign with a squeaker, 16-15 at home to Pocklington and followed that with an excellent “w” on the road at Scarborough. Going into week three with two wins from two, Heath then hit a bump in the road as Malton and Norton proved to be an immovable force, holding on for a five point win. Last week, it got tight again for Heath as they pinched a 19-17 decision at Durham City. We make the trip to Halifax to see Heath on 4th December and they hove into view at our place on Saturday 2nd April.

Sat below Heath, but also with three wins from four tucked down their jockey shorts are Old Brods. The Brods beat Pocklington 31-17 last week, but were on the wrong end of a 36-12 decision over at Stacks Field the week before. In the first two weeks of the season Brods opened up with a good little “w” up in Scotland when they beat Morpeth 15-8 and they followed that win with a tidy little victory in week two, beating Morley 22-7.

Eighth in the table we find Scarborough, who have pocketed 2 wins and a draw in their first four games. Their first two games brought a draw from Driffield in week one and a defeat by Heath 25-18 in game 2. In Week 3 they came to Bingley and knocked over 59 points whilst allowing The Bees to pinch a handsome looking 32 back. Their winning ways continued last week as they pipped Morley 26-24.

We get our chance at redemption when we take a charabanc to the seaside to open the New Year on January 8th.

In position 9, 10 and 11, we find Morley, Pocklington and Morpeth. Morley and Pocklington are both recorded as having played only three league fixtures as the game between them on 18th September was not completed. Morley opened their campaign by knocking the Bees over to the tune of 45 points to seven at Wagon Lane, but they were unable to follow that up with another win as they capitulated to Old Brods, 22-7 in week 2. Last week Morley lost by two in a 26-24 nail biter at Scarborough. We finish the season with the return fixture at Scatcherd Lane on 23rd April. Hopefully there will be sufficient sunlight out beyond the White Rose Shopping Centre, to allow us to finish the game without having to find some extra candle power to lift us from the murk.

Pocklington are up next and from their four games on the schedule, they have actually only managed to complete two. Their first game was a 16-15 defeat at Heath, they were then awarded a walkover as we couldn't raise a side. In week 3 their visit to Morley is logged as postponed on the RFU website but Morley has it logged as a 28-17 win. How odd.

Anyway last week, on September 25th, Pocklington lost at Old Brods 31-17. There was talk of the cancelled fixture from September 11 being replayed in October, but the nice man from the RFU has confirmed this will not happen and we will be playing Moortown in the Yorkshire Shield at Wagon Lane.

So having left the glamour of Pocklington. behind in that last paragraph, we are now down among the dead men and the bottom three clubs, who have yet to muster a win between them. That bottom three is made up of the Bees, Consett and Durham. Hopefully wins will be on the agenda as each club plays the other, unless we are playing under Socialist principles and we all take a winner’s medal from a heroic draw.

The first of those crunch fixtures presents itself this Saturday when we host Durham City. I shall look deeper into this fixture later this week, but the game does give the possibility that both sides can escape from negative equity by securing a win. We play Moortown in the Cup on the 9th but we have a further chance to further our cause when we visit Consett on 16th October.

Consett travel to Heath this Saturday, which looks like a toughie. Their results so far this season don’t make easy reading as they opened the season at Olicana and were given a good old fashioned pasting by 82-0. Things calmed down somewhat in their home debut as Cleckheaton ran out 34-20 winners and on September 18th, Moortown romped home 59-17. Things only improved marginally last week for Consett as Driffield tore off a 55-10 shaped strip.

We travel to Consett on 16th and they return the favour when they visit us on 29th January.

Which leaves us with this week’s opposition, Durham City. Durham pitched up to play Cleckheaton on the first day of the season, but I believe they did not have their squad fully registered so Cleck were awarded a walkover win. Week two saw Mo’town visiting Durham and the men from just off Leeds Ring Road ran home with a 42-25 win. Durham then travelled to Driffield in week 3 and the home side prevailed 33-5. Last week it looks like things brightened up for Durham as they came within a whisker or two of Heath in a 17-19 reverse.

We travel to Durham for the reverse fixture of this weekend’s set-to on 22nd January.

That’s enough waffle from me for a Wednesday. Part Two of this epic rant will be with you on Friday.

Pip,pip.